As I was walking out the door this morning, I saw what I thought was a
crumbly wet leaf sitting in our entryway. Having just vacuumed, I
decided to pick it up and throw it out the door.
It was cat vomit. I had just picked up a handful of cat vomit.
That’s how my day started today. A handful of cat vomit. I guess you
can only go up from there.
Friday night I went to a Winter Hawks
game and watched them win, but it was a Pyrrhic victory at best. I never
thought I could watch us win and think the game sucked so bad.
Saturday morning Jenn’s family was having family pictures taken. Since
the mall they were having pictures done was halfway to the store I
wanted to go to that day, I said I’d go, too, hang out at the mall while
they were getting pictures, then Jenn and I could continue on to my
We got to the mall at 10, but the mall opens at 10, so we all stumbled
around trying to find each other because we all came in different
entrances. The photo appointment was at 11, but when we checked in, we
found they were running way behind. I decided to walk the mall.
I probably walked 30 miles. Jenn’s family didn’t even get in until
almost noon, then didn’t get out until nearly one. I have about an
hour-and-a-half’s worth of tolerance for the mall, so after three hours
I was ready to leave before I hurt someone.
Jenn wanted to get food, so we went to Denny’s. Now, Denny’s is not
somewhere that I ever plan to end up, but we somehow actually
planned to go to Denny’s that day. I won’t go into details, but I left
there feeling I had consumed way too much grease and I realized again
why it is that I never plan to end up at Denny’s.
After Denny’s we made a Costco run - I got my copy of the Indiana
Jones trilogy on
DVD - and
a Fry’s run - I got Time Crisis
another light gun game, with the gun so I can play one person with two
guns or two players.
Saturday night was another hockey game. We won again and it was better
hockey all the way around, but it still didn’t really get me into the
game. Oh well, right? A win’s a win.
Sunday morning we went to my parents’ house and washed our cars. It’d
been like a month since I’d washed mine and it was definitely time. That
took most of the morning, and then we went back home and finished up the
chores that we didn’t get time for Saturday.
Sunday evening, besides watching Alias, we went to see the Cirque du
Soleil production Alegría.
I’m a huge Cirque fan. I’ve seen Mystere in Las Vegas like three
times, I’ve seen Saltimbanco and Dralion as they’ve come through
Portland, and now I’ve seen Alegría.
While it isn’t my favorite of the shows I’ve seen, I liked it. It
definitely reminded me of the classic circus, but with an upgraded feel
so it appealed to the child inside an adult. There were acrobats and
trapeze artists and a strong man and clowns… and all of it came
The thing about Cirque, though, is that, for me, it means more than
just seeing the show. Seeing Cirque somehow renews my faith in humanity.
It shows me that there can be form without function and that’s
sometimes a Good Thing. It shows me that you can be happy just for the
sake of being happy. It shows me that creativity and beauty in the world
aren’t necessarily dead, and that you can be rewarded for instilling
great emotions in people.
I sit in my cube all day coding. I hate coding. Sure, it takes some
creativity to solve problems programmatically, but when all is said and
done, all you’ve accomplished that day is pushing bits around. Did it
make any real difference? Is there anything to show for it? No.
Seeing these shows makes me realize I really should have just gone for
the art school and not done computer science. Now I’m pretty much stuck
where I’m at, and without the money and time to go back and learn the
stuff I should have learned to begin with, I’m not qualified to do
anything else. But since I can’t do that, it helps to know that style
and art really aren’t dead, and even if I can’t generate them for other
people, I can take part in the enjoyment.
I thought about maybe getting a job at the Cirque main office or
something. Even doing what I’m already doing, but for a company where I
fully believe in and support the product. (I mean, online banking
software? Who cares?!) But then I also thought that once you see the
underworkings of the beautiful machine, once you see that sort of thing
every day… you may get anesthetized to it. Would it lose its meaning?
Or would contributing to the effort be fulfilling? Somehow I don’t think
I’ll ever have the opportunity to find out.
So I look forward to seeing the Cirque come to town, and I’m sad when
it’s over. While I’m there, I wish I could take part in it, living the
dream. Until the next time they’re here I’ll just hope to carry the
feeling inside me.