It’s 7:00p, and after a long day at work, Jenn and I decide it’s time to
go get something to eat. Pizza sounds good, so we head to the local
Schmizza to get a couple of slices.
Jenn gets a slice of “Sch’meat’za” (an all-meat special), an order of
breadsticks, and a small drink. I think the “No Kiss Tonite” (garlic
chicken, alfredo, feta, and red onion) sounds good, so I get that, a
“Genoa” (another all-meat special), and a small drink.
The mood is relaxed as we eat our pizza, watch a little Nickelodeon on
the TVs hanging around the place, and talk about our recent debacle
making wedding invitations. (No, the invitations aren’t going quite as
smoothly - or as cheaply - as I’d like, but I think we’ve got the
details ironed out now, so it’s time to jump in and make them. But I
digress.)
The pizza is finished and it’s time to pack up and go. Jenn has some
breadsticks left over, so she gets up to get a box to take the remainder
home in. It’s a bus-your-own-table kind of joint, so while she does
that, I take the plates over to the garbage can.
I scrape the plates off into the trash, then put the plates and
silverware into the box sitting on top of the trash. I pick my cup up
and decide that, before we go, I should top it off with some soda so I
can take that in the car with me.
I take a drink of soda as I head toward the dispenser and look over to
see how Jenn’s doing. Looks like she’s loaded up her breadsticks and is
waiting. The breadstick box is on the table, her drink is on the table,
my drink is on the table…
My drink is on the table.
Hang on, my drink is on the table.
Then what’s this drink in my hand?
No.
No, no, no.
Nonononononononononononono.
Please don’t tell me I just picked this drink up off the top of the
garbage can and started drinking it.
But I did. I’m drinking some random drink. From on top of the garbage
can.
I think I’m going to be sick.
“Jenn, we need to go home now. I have to Listerine and brush my
teeth.”
