Lockergnome finally posted my security column rebuttal. Day late and a dollar short, but we’ll take it.

There’s an interesting article in the Willamette Week local newspaper conjecturing on why Oregonians are so fat. I’ve actually wondered that myself - why aren’t I motivated to do something about these ridiculous “love handles” or the gut that continually generates the need for newer, larger pants?

Of all of the ideas they bring up, I think the weather is probably the most accurate reason we’re fat… at least, that’s how it is for me. Who wants to go riding your bike in the drizzle? Who wants to do anything when it’s pouring down outside? With an average of only 68 non-rain days per year, it’s no wonder.

They also mention that fatty foods are much more affordable than healthy foods. I’ll agree with that, too. I was just mentioning the other day that it’d be nice if you could go up to McDonald’s or something and get a healthy meal for $3 instead of filling up on deep fried fat.

Maybe I should move somewhere sunny. I wonder if I’d be more motivated to exercise. Then again, I also wonder if I’m just inherently lazy and should accept that for what it is.

I tried to get a picture of this asswipe, but it was too dark out.

I think I was just about killed today on my way in to work. Everything was going swimmingly when I pulled up to the stoplight at SW 4th and Caruthers. I was the third car in line. When the light turned green I started moving through the intersection, and when I was just about through it, this asshole in a silver Volkswagen cuts right in front of me, not only changing lanes in an intersection without signaling, but trying to fit a full car in a half car’s length. I slammed on the brakes and the horn, swerving to avoid getting my front passenger fender taken clean off and the guy (I assume it was a guy, but I couldn’t see) continued without even noticing. He (she/it/whatever) came close to running me head-on into a concrete dividing wall.

Like I said, after recovering from this feat of ridiculousness, I caught up with the car but wasn’t able to get a picture because it was too dark. His/her license plate was ZPR 448, though. Normally I wouldn’t post something like that, but when you’re as reckless as that, you deserve it.

Sometimes I wish I was an undercover cop so I could pull these assholes over. I mean, seriously, folks, if you can’t think ahead enough to know you need to be in a particular lane, at least wait until someone lets you in. Accept the consequences of your stupidity if no one does and get on somewhere else. Next time, maybe you’ll remember to get in line like everyone else.

Many people know about my abundant, vehement hatred for the Comic Sans font. People using it generally choose the most inappropriate places to use it - in the body of corporate emails, for example. The interesting thing is that I’ve only really found one or two other people in my travels who share my sentiment.

Turns out I’m not as alone as I thought.

I will admit I’m a fan of the game Dance Dance Revolution, but I’ll also admit I suck at it. Why? I’ve only ever really played on a reasonably cheap soft dance pad. (Well, that and I’m totally not coordinated. But we’ll blame the pad for my shortcomings and move on.)

To that end, I think I need to get a metal dance pad. Arcade feel, no slipping around (which is the biggest problem I have with the soft pad)… might be a good thing. Costs $139 plus shipping, but I’d wager if you’re going to actually PLAY the game, this is probably the way to go.

Plus, I can see that the health benefits may be in my favor. I hate exercise, but I love Dance Dance. May be something to think about, seeing as how the PS3 and XBox Next (as they’re being called, respectively) won’t be out for another year or two, and those will be my next console-related investments of significance, methinks.