Sunday morning Jenn and I went out and worked in the back yard. There’s
sort of a drainage issue along the north fence in our back yard, so we
needed to widen the flower beds, till up the ground, and plant something
in there that can stand living in a bog. To that end, we needed to rent
a rototiller, which we got from Home Depot.
I’ve never rototilled anything. I’ve seen it done, and the guy at the
store explained how the tiller works, but I’ve never actually personally
I mean, holy shit.
I’m a desk jockey. Seriously, I sit on my ass all day and the most
strenuous it gets is me reaching from the keyboard to my coffee or
getting up to walk to the car to go get lunch.
That rototiller damn near killed me. It reminded me a lot of running a
garden-oriented jackhammer crossed with holding back an entire dog sled
team single-handedly. All we had to do was an 18 foot by four foot
section, and it was all I could do to get that done. I am a huge, huge
It’s worse today. Yesterday I thought I was feeling pretty bad. Today I
feel horrible. Everything on me aches. I can barely turn my head.
Reaching for my coffee hurts, so I’m just sort of looking at it
longingly, hoping to develop telekinetic powers that will get the coffee
from my cup into my mouth. I have bruises on my legs, but I’m not sure
how I got them. I don’t remember hitting my shins with anything, but the
bruises are there and they weren’t there pre-tiller. (What the hell were
my shins doing anywhere near that thing? Are the bruises unrelated?) I
can’t grip anything, either, because the insides of my arms hurt so bad
when I close my hands. Stretching the elastic of my boxers to get them
over my fat ass posed a serious threat this morning. I nearly had to
call in due to inability to put on pants.
Anyway, I’m dying today, but the flower bed has been widened and
tilled, so it’s ready for some plants to go in. Jenn picked some up from
the nursery and will be putting those in tonight. Something grassy
looking, but I was too tired to ask. Whatever it is, it’d better love