While listening to an online seminar about .NET application deployment and sipping water from my Fuck Off mug, I was doing a little searching for Mad Hatter hats.

Now, I'm particular about exactly what color, etc., a Mad Hatter hat should be if it wants to rest atop my hallowed head. It must be green with a dark green band. It must look absolutely identical to the Mad Hatter's hat in the Walt Disney version of Alice in Wonderland. Not "American McGee's" Alice. Not some psychedelic wannabe Alice. Walt Disney's version of Alice in Wonderland. Accept no substitutes.

I can't find any that fit the description.

I know I saw them when I was at Disneyland umpteen years ago. They were there, and they were perfect. I just can't find them now.

I found many, many sites selling these psychedelic pot smoker druggie hats that are generally shaped like the Mad Hatter's hat, but none of them actually is the One True Hat.

I did see one on auction at eBay, but it's already sold and I don't even know if it'd fit me.

I looked for a pattern online (could the McCall's site be any slower?), but no luck.

I did find this costume from BadPlanet.com that is under the "Officially Licensed Disney" section, but... "one size fits most" sort of rules it out for tall, long-armed folks. $49 isn't a bad price, though. (They also have an Alice costume, by the way. Did I not tell you Alice is a hottie?) I'm not big on the satin thing, but it's an option. (BadPlanet also has a "spicy women" section in their "Adult Costumes" category. Well worth a look.)

What that amounts to is that it may be easier (and cheaper) to go ninja than it will be to go Mad Hatter for Halloween. Somewhat disappointing, but not surprising.

Something I forgot to mention earlier: The Alias premiere was last night and it rocked. I can only hope they keep up the good work.

Plus, it doesn't hurt that Jennifer Garner is hot.