Hey, gang.

Due to lack of popular demand, I’ve opened up the paraesthesia Junk Store. Right now, I’m selling one - count ‘em - one t-shirt style. Hey, it’s my first foray into t-shirt design. Anyway, I’ve got this thing set up so I can now create new t-shirt styles and everyone who gives a rat’s ass can wear paraesthesia.

The existing shirt style is, shall we say, a little “less than exciting.” I’ll work on some new ones and see what I can put out there. Honestly, it’s mostly for myself - this is the best/only way I know to make up my own custom shirts and crap. But I figured, might as well open it up to the rest of the world too. You guys might want some, right?

I woke up this morning 10 minutes before my alarm went off because a guy in my dream shot me in the nuts with a silenced .22 semi-automatic pistol.

I really should probably stop reading spy novels.

Ahem.

Today, as many may know, is Sysadmin Appreciation Day.

And let me say that I have the coolest boss ever, because he got me a $50 gift certificate to ThinkGeek in honor of said day.

So I clicked over to my ThinkGeek Wish List and ordered myself up a SoundBug and a cool SQL t-shirt. I’m stoked.

I pulled out yet another nice, chilly beverage from the refrigerator under my desk this morning. I cannot stress the convenience I’ve found in such a thing. I really need to get some running water and a microwave in here.

I still haven’t decided what I should get with the money from the other fridge. I figure I’ve got about $80 to work with, so I could get lots of small things - DVDs, CDs, etc. - or I could get one big thing. I’m leaning towards one big thing. But what? Options include…

• Ottawa Senators home jersey
• Grand Theft Auto: Vice City (preorder) - I’d actually probably get this at Software Etc. at the mall because you can preorder and get a free strategy guide with it
• The big Alphonse Mucha book I’ve been looking at
• A glare screen for my television (the glare on our TV is awful)
• A hooker (okay, I was kidding about that one, but I had to make sure you were still paying attention)
• A Cost Plus World Market shopping spree (which would last about six seconds because I like all the expensive stuff in there)

I’m just not sure. I’m sort of an impulse shopper, so I don’t know what I want until I walk through the store and see it. I’m leaning towards the Senators jersey, though. You can never have enough hockey jerseys. Stylish and comfortable.

I think I will go this weekend to see the new Austin Powers movie. I’ve heard a lot of good things about it, so I’m hoping it’s as funny as it sounds. I crack up every time I see the preview where Austin is staring at Fred Savage’s mole. “MOLE! Moleymoleymoleymoleymoley….” It just never gets old.

I still haven’t seen Men In Black 2 yet. I heard it wasn’t all that and a bag of chips, so I guess I’ll wait for it to hit the Bagdad and then go see it for three bucks.

Jenn and I saw Phantom of the Opera last night and it was wonderful. Honestly, it was all I hoped it would be. The costumes were perfect, the sets were perfect, everything was great. Only two things I think were issues…

First, the way I imagined it was slightly different than how it played out on stage. Yeah, not an issue really, but sort of an interesting turn. Most of it was right, mainly just the end was different than how I expected it. Second, the lady who played Christine was just a tad sharp on everything she sang in the first half of the show. I was okay with it and decided to ignore it, but leave it to my mom to break me from my Suspension of Disbelief and remind me repeatedly about how sharp she was.

Overall, though, brilliance. I’d definitely see it again if it comes back. I’m starting to think about getting a Portland Opera subscription because there are lots of other shows I want to see as well. It’s expensive, though. I dunno.

Speaking of expensive, we ate dinner at this place downtown called “Veritable Quandary.” It was sort of… well, “preppy,” in a Pottery Barn sense. People wearing black shirts and tortoise-shell glasses. Waaaay too many wines on the wine list and even more people that thought they could actually tell the difference between them all. Very good food - Jenn and I both had the “Black Angus NY steak” - but slightly on the spendy side. It’s actually got a restaurant and a bar; the restaurant is in the back, the bar’s up front. The bar sounded like it had some tasty normal-people food, so we may have to go back and check that out.

I pulled a nice, cold drink out of my new birthday refrigerator this morning and it’s just right. It took about 24 hours for the fridge to get up to full speed, but now it’s ready to chill.

My boss/friend, Greg, just came over and told me he’s going to the coast for the day, taking some friends from New Mexico who haven’t been to the Oregon Coast yet.

I have a problem with the Oregon Coast - that it’s a coast and not a beach. What’s the difference? If you go to the beach, you expect sand-colored sand, nice blue water you can wade in, sun… you see where I’m going with this. Hawaii has beaches. California and Florida have beaches.

Oregon has a coast. You can’t wade, really, because if you spend too long in the water you’re going to get frostbite. You can’t sit on the sand for too long because the wind will sandblast your face and any other exposed body parts. You can’t wear glasses because it’s always misty there (and you know about the magnetic properties of water and glasses). The sand is a dingy brown-gray. The water is… dingy brown-gray.

I love beaches. I hate the Oregon Coast.

Man, I sure go off on little rants at the drop of a hat, don’t I? Here, I was expecting to write a nice review of my Phantom show, and then I get sidetracked by my hatred for the Oregon Coast. Welcome to my world. Now do you see how I could go out without combing my hair?

(Yes, it is a word.)

I have to go off on this one because it’s one of those pet peeves that I’m sure bothers everyone out there but nobody really talks about it because they don’t want peoples’ feelings to be hurt.

System administrators, especially those concerned with security, are, by and large, excessively pompous individuals.

Either that, or they don’t have any social skills.

Or maybe both.

The reason I say this is that, over the course of my employ with various technology-related companies and whatnot, I’ve had the opportunity to deal with several different sysadmins, and most of them had a particular security focus (as a good sysadmin should). By that same token, almost all of them have committed the following gaucheries while discussing their various interests with me… keeping in mind that I, too, am a reasonably well-versed sysadmin, at least where the applications I am responsible for are concerned:

• Treated me like I dropped out of school in the fourth grade.
• Directly contradicted everything I said, then later restated my thought, taking it as their own, denying that I said it to begin with.
• Spoke to me as though English were not my first language (hey, slower and louder always makes me feel like I’m speaking with a peer).
• Explained to me a basic concept as though it were the first time I’d ever heard of such a thing. For example, I’m a web application developer… why would you explain to me what a web server does? I’m pretty sure I’ve got that down.
• Quoted, verbatim, security notifications received from agencies like CERT, and claimed it as their own thought.
• Suggested that they, as an admitted non-programmer, might know more about programming than me.

I think you see where I’m going. I don’t like being treated as though I’m stupid. And you can’t just say “it’s because they’re trying to teach me.” Bullshit. You’ve been in school, right? RIGHT? There were two kinds of teachers: the teachers that took the time to explain things to you the right way; and the teachers who were condescending about everything and thought all the kids were stupid.

Guess which kind of “teacher” sysadmins are.

One of the main reasons I bring this up is that Sysadmin Appreciation Day is coming up on Friday. I don’t expect anything out of it, but if you do decide to “appreciate” your local sysadmin, keep in mind whether they’re condescending and bitchy or whether they’re nice and explain things reasonably.

Again, not all sysadmins are like that. Sometimes you get the good ones; the ones with social skills. I’m just saying they’re few and far between.

Surprisingly enough, the birthday barbecue last night went off without a hitch.

People in attendance:

• Grandma and Grandpa (Dad’s parents)
• Granddad (Mom’s father)
• Tori (sister)
• Tai (sister) and Dan (Tai’s fiancee)
• Mom and Dad
• Jenn
• Dan and Aggie (Jenn’s parents)

Dad cooked up some burgers on the grill and we had chips, dip, and various fruit/vegetable salads. We also had a Grand Marnier chocolate cake (my favorite) from JaCiva’s, a local chocolatier, courtesy of Jenn. Mom got me some Monsters, Inc. plates, napkins, and tablecloths, which were fun. People seemed to get along pretty well and there was no drunken brawling, so I would consider it a success.

This was actually the first event that my parents and Jenn’s parents have spent any time together at. They seemed to get along rather well, especially our fathers, who talked about model trains and remote control HumVees most of the night.

The gifts were plentiful and all were cool (which is a rarity… You know how you usually get that one gift and you’re speechless because it wasn’t remotely anything you wanted? That didn’t happen.). I got:

• From Tori, a funky zebra puppet that I can torment my kitty Xev with; and a Survivor board game that looks like quite a lot of fun
• From Tai, an electronic meat thermometer fork (I barbecue a lot, so that’ll be handy)
• From Dad’s parents, a check (you can always use money); and a windchime that has hung in their kitchen for, well, my entire lifetime as far as I know… very cool, since it totally reminds me of them
• From Jenn’s parents, a small refrigerator/freezer to go under my desk at work
• From my parents, a strategy guide for Medal of Honor: Frontline; a big box of Crest Whitestrips (is that a hint?); and… a small refrigerator/freezer to go under my desk at work

Yes, that means I have two refrigerators. Great minds think alike, eh? Interestingly enough, the two are actually identical items with different brands attached to them. Too funny. So I’ve got one plugged in here at work now doing its thing and the other will get returned for… well, I don’t know yet. I’ve gotta think about what I want instead. Maybe some binoculars or a digital camera. I’m not sure how much the fridges cost.

All in all, a rather successful celebration. Tonight Jenn and I will have dinner at Veritable Quandary downtown and then see Phantom of the Opera. I’m looking forward to a brilliant evening.